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Monday, May 17, 2010

A Little Southern Etiquette

 
Southern women know everybody's first name: 
Honey, Darlin', and Shugah

Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Driving Miss Daisy
Steel Magnolias
Gone With the Wind

Southerners know their religions:
Baptist
Methodist
Football


Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna

Southern girls know the three deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food

Only a southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit.
And that you don't HAVE them, you PITCH them.


Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder".

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is.  As in: "Going to town, be back directly".

A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.

In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.

Even Southern babies know that "gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.

For those who are not from the South, but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'all's front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could".

And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff....bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!


Taken from Cheatham Now newspaper

9 comments:

Holly said...

I for one feel blessed to call myself a Southerner. Having lived out of the South I can tell you there ain't no better place than the good ole south!

erikab said...

Lol. I read this a couple years ago, but I still love it! We had a couple over for games last night and tried to explain why exactly we want so badly to get back to Tennessee and other than the obvious family and weather, all we could say is, "It's just...better!"

Connie said...

I love to hear y'all used in speech, it seems so all inclusive and warm. Thanks for explaining the other stuff.

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

Awwwwwwwwww, I so wish I could hang a sign on my front porch, which reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could".

This Yankee loves the South...

Gentle hugs,
"Miss Amelia"

Susan said...

What a great post. I might add that when that Southerner is pointing the direction of yonder, they will probably add the words "this side" or "that side" to make the directions more specific. xoxo from another one of those G.R.I.T.S.

queenbee4 said...

I love these! And every good southern girl knows that you can say anything about anyone and as long as you follow it up with "Bless her heart" it's never mean. ever

Parsley said...

HAHA, I guess I'm a southern woman. I'm fixin to go make some sweet tea. ;-)

Eric and Rozanne said...

Those were so fun to read. Being a western girl myself, I've had fun learning about the South the past couple of years while living here. People are so good and kind here.

I might have to take that Southernness as a second language so I can learn my manners. :)

Sharon said...

Love this.

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